can't take my eyes off of you
by darkredlipstick
Summary: When you go to sleep at night, you like to dream. You like to dream that you were athletic. You were popular. You were liked. You had it all- great acting skills, flawless singing skills, perfected dance movements, Jade West/ one sided Rade, full on Bade


**I'm not a Rade fan. I'm a hardcore Bade fan. I just wanted to try out this idea after watching Survival of the Hottest. I usually write Seddie stories because they're my main ship, but Fanfiction needs more Bade stories lately.**

**Also- when stuff is bold in parenthesis, it's Jade's voice. Not **_**Jade**_**. Her **_**voice**_**. Her voice in Robbie's head. Clear?**

**Robbie's POV**

She's a she-devil.

She's a witch.

She's evil.

She's cruel.

She hates you.

But yet you're madly _inlove_ with her.

You can sit in that **uncomfortable** lotus flower position for days&days&days and talk about the way her dark brown hair curls in ringlets and the way her blue&pink&white streaks bring out those perfect blue eyes. You love the way she dresses in mostly black; it gives her a dark/daring/dangerous vibe that you can't get enough of.

When you were a kid, you had to go to the doctor's because you felt t e r r i b l y ill. He told you needed to stop eating all those sour gummy worms even though you loved them sososo much.

_{jade is the new sour gummy worm}_

/

You know she's dating Beck. They've been dating 2 years, 3 months and eleven days. You remember that sometime in those two days she broke up with him because she got jealous of Alyssa Vaughn but you don't remember exactly how they got back together four days later.

**[**it had something to do with a big dog, Beck's dad, a can of lemonade and Tori**)**

You don't resent Beck, _oh no_ you don't _resent_ him. It's not _his fault_ that every pretty **a n d **ugly girl is attracted to him. It's not _his fault_ his jeans fit him perfectly unlike yours. It's not _his fault_ he's an amazing actor and handsome boy.

But it _is his fault_ that he has the most beautiful/special/precious girl in the world.

/

She hates Rex. Rex hates her. It's a mutual relationship, Rex tells you a lot. You don't protest a lot when Jade violently attacks Rex physically or verbally. You laugh sometimes when Rex attacks her verbally – because _really_? that's the only way he can – to keep your friends away from the suspicion of you possibly falling for this girl.

You've considered many times late at night, to stop bringing Rex to school. If she hates Rex, the only way she could possibly ever feel a smalltinylittle something for you is if she doesn't have to deal with Rex every day.

But it would raise too much suspicion. They'd ask why you stopped bringing Rex. You would fumble on your words and eventually spill it out.

_then she would kill you_.

/

You wish you could look like Beck. Or even Andre.

Their legs aren't pencils that are "soclose" to breaking in half. Their chests don't show their ribs or pale flesh. They don't wear gigantic Grandpa glasses or have bright pink lips. Their hair isn't uncontrollably curly.

Girls like Andre because he's funny. (**You're clearly not) **He's charming. (**You couldn't be if you tried)** He's muscular. (**Don't even get me started-) **He's not the typical sandy blond haired, blue eyed, Caucasian California surfer boy. He's different and he's _gifted_. Music is his best friend, give him an instrument and he'll turn it into _magic._ (**You'd turn it into a s h e s)**

Girls love Beck because he's perfect. (**You know it's true) **He's beautiful. (**Of course he is and always will be**) He's talented. (**That's my boy for you**) He's mysterious but he's got nothing to hide. He's got so many girls on his side but he only has eyes for Jade West.

You have none of that. All you have is a puppet, a guitar and a few friends.

/

Cat could be nice to love.

She's insane.

She's weird.

She's gifted.

She's ditzy.

But she kind-of likes you.

_(she's jade's best friend)_

Tori could be nice to love.

She's pretty.

She's talented.

She's funny.

She's sneaky.

But she wouldn't like you.

_(and jade hates her anyways)_

Trina could be…different…to love.

She's not talented.

She's not liked.

She's not funny.

She's not it.

But she would never like you.

_(jade hates her even more than her sister)_

/

When you go to sleep at night, you like to dream.

You like to dream that you were athletic. You were popular. You were liked.

You had it all- great acting skills, flawless singing skills, perfected dance movements, Jade West.

Instead of Beck, she'd get jealous whenever a pretty brunette cheerleader tried to flirt with you. She'd pin you up against the wall, lean in reallyclose and she'd-

That's when the dream usually ends.

/

You're tired of waiting in the background. You're tired of keeping quiet about your love. It irritates you that **now** they've been dating 2 years, 3 months and twenty three days and everything seems perfect.

You want him to kiss Tori again. You want Sinjin to "flirt" with Jade. You want them to fight over something silly, like where should they go on their date tonight. You want something to mess them up, to ruin their relationship. It's just not fair.

So you decide to do something. You decide that the only way you're ever going to get what you want- you have to do it.

You learn from various sources (**Sikowitz's class**) that she needs to stay after school and work on a missing script she never turned in.

You stay after school and wait for her, hiding behind the rows of lockers for hours you think. When she finally emerges from Sikowitz's classroom and heads to her own locker, you come out of hiding and walk towards her.

Jade doesn't acknowledge your presence at first but then you clear your throat and she gives you her famous death glare.

"What?" She snaps. You can hear the gum in her mouth as she snaps it.

Loud.

You clear your own throat nervously. "Look Jade-"

"Is this important? Because Beck's waiting for me outside-"

You leaned forward and kissed her. Literally, senselessly. You didn't think about the book she was holding, or Rex in your arm, or the fact that Beck could walk in any minute. (**You wanted him to**).You could only taste the coffee on her lips and the smell of cinnamon that seemed to cloud around her.

You were in _heaven._

H o w e v e r **Jade was not**.

Jade pushed you off of her so fast you barely had time to balance yourself before falling on your ass.

You were terrified to look up but her force drew your face up towards her.

Her blue eyes burned firecrackers onto your face, your skin exploding to pieces. She put her book in her locker and slammed it shut.

She leaned down towards you, her cinnamon scent and coffee breath circling your body, "I'm. Going. To. Torture. You." She hisses, her voice full of denom. She stands up straight and stalks out of the school.

/

You're terrified to go to school the next day. You looked on TheSlap constantly to make sure she didn't post anything and surprisingly- she didn't.

Nobody texted you or called you – well Cat did but she never said a word about the kiss – and said anything about it.

You thought you were safe for the moment.

/

Jade's true to her word alright.

Now she knows you love her sososo much and she makes sure you don't forget it.

Now in the morning when you walk by her locker, she sees you in the corner of her those deviously dazzling eyes. She kisses Beck with more passion than you've ever seen. (**That's the point**)

In Sikowitz's class, the ever loony and _oblivious _ Sikowitz, decides to pair up the class to prepare a scene for tomorrow.

He pairs Cat and Andre, Jessica and Chris, Meaghan and Andrew, Tori and Beck-

You see Jade tense up and tighten her grip on Beck's arm-

Jade and Robbie.

Jade doesn't frown but smirk as she catches your frightened expression.

Sikowitz calls all the girls up to the front to grab a script to practice from. Jade stands up- fully aware that she has yours and Beck's attention on her hips- and swayswaysways up to Sikowitz. The bell rings and she drops a three page script on your bony lap.

"I'll be at your house at 7:00 sharp." She murmurs _softly_ in your ear. You catch a whiff of cinnamon and coffee tickles your nose.

She hurries back to Beck – who seems confused on why she's not strangling Tori – and intertwines their fingers.

She starts talking about something as she pulled him out of the classroom while the _i n n o c e n t _Tori Vega tried to discuss a meeting place tonight.

/

At 7:00 sharp, your doorbell rings loud and clear in your empty/quiet/lonely house. You jump up and rush to the door. You do a quick checklist in your head:

Rex in room?

_(Check)_

Shirtless?

_(Check)_

Popcorn in the living room, TV movie on pause?

_(Check)_

Dim lights?

_(Check)_

You open the door in a seductive manner that completely flies over Jade's head. She gives you a blank, bored look and pushes you as she walks inside.

"Put on a shirt. Your ribs disgust me." She snaps bitterly as she relaxes on the couch.

You ignore her harsh words and slide a baggy sweatshirt over your head.

"Sorry about that. Just finished working out and stuff." You lie when you walk into the living room.

Jade was stuffing a piece of popcorn in her mouth when she freezes and turns to stare at you with a look of disbelief.

"Don't lie to me. It's not funny. Besides I don't give a damn about your personal life, I'm only here to work on this script. Did you look over it yet?"

"Kind of."

"Kind of?"

"Yup."

"Yup as in what? You did or you didn't?"

"Kind of."

"Yes or no?"

"Both."

"No Robbie, there's no _both_ to this question. It's either you looked at it or you didn't and could you please give me a fucking straight answer?" Jade asks, her voice eerily calm.

"Okay…yes."

"Then why didn't you say that?"

"Because I only-"

"Never mind. Your idioticness will just have to wait. Besides we need to work on this." Jade decides taking her script out of her bag.

You take yours off the coffee table and read over it again. It's about a boy and girl who are trapped underneath a crumbling building who love each other. They profess their love for each other when they realize they have little time. The girl kisses the boy and they're pulling apart when a brick falls on top of the girl and she dies. The boy wails out in devastation and cries for her.

Jade begins her lines, as unenthusiastically as ever. You decide to copy her.

Once you read it through – Jade remained emotionless through the kiss section – Jade decides you should stand up and act it out. You hesitantly ask her about the kiss scene and realize it was the wrong thing to say because she **glares daggers **into your eyes.

"Don't even think about it."

She begins her lines, this time really acting. You again decide to follow her lead and get into character. She skips the kiss and moves on when you get to that part h o w e v e r.

You go over the scene a few more times until she decides you're going to say it without the script. Like the last times, she skips the kiss scene.

/

You're sitting in the back row in Sikowitz's class as you watch Beck and Tori's scene. Theirs is about two siblings who find out their father died and they have to support their family.

It wasn't a good scene at all but Beck and Tori obviously made it work.

Sikowitz calls you and Jade up to the front. You're not nervous about performing the scene. You're just nervous about performing the scene _with Jade_.

You haven't practiced the kiss at all and you're wondering if she's going to skip it entirely.

She begins her part, perfectly as usual, and you leave Robbie Shapiro, the boy who loves Jade West, and become Kevin Arbelez, the boy who loves Cassie David. You and Jade bring the scene and fear to life as you keep acting it out.

You're saying your line just before the kiss and you've already prepared yourself for her to just skip it out.

You're about to say your next line when Jade – erm Cassie – leans in and kisses you. You nearly stumble backwards from the shock and force of it but you feel yourself relaxing into her strong grip on **your** arm.

_(how do you like that Beck?)_

She pulls away, leaving her famous scent behind you. In the corner of your eye, you see Beck sitting up a little straighter_(and stiffer) _and Tori's jaw is on the ground.

You finish the scene flawlessly and walk back to your seat while Cat and Andre go up. You don't pay them much attention because all you can see right now is those brunette ringlets and baby blue eyes tattooing themselves in your heart.

_F o r e v e r_

/

You still love Jade, thirteen days after the kiss.

You still love Jade, ten days after the scene.

And she, as hell, still knows.

Beck didn't say much about your scene that day. At lunch though he seemed to make sure you and Jade were sitting as f a r a p a r t as possible.

/

You're not sure what to think anymore.

Maybe you like Jade, maybe you love Jade, maybe you hate Jade, maybe you can't stand to see Jade.

She loves torturing you but you put yourself in that position. You put yourself up for the hurt/shattered heart/pain she puts you through.

She loves torturing you practically as much as she loves Beck. (**That's a whole lot**)

You know you can't stand the way she kisses him. She slides her pale arm around his neck and smiles a 24 carat diamond smile into his adoring eyes. He slides his tanner arm around her waist and pullsherclosetohim as their lips interlock.

You know what Jade tastes like. _{you love her taste}_

But you're curious to what Beck tastes like. What about it makes Jade, Tori and every other girl so attracted to him?

You consider asking Jade yourself but come up with a different way.

(**I never thought you were so stupid- even Dumbo **_**thinks**_** you're stupid) **

/

You ask Beck to talk for a minute.

He agrees.

You start talking about some made up story about how you need your new car repaired.

"What kind of car?"

"A used 2008 Volvo s60."

"Is it in bad shape?"

"Not really. It's just not working right."

"Well we can check it out-"

You lean forward and kiss him. You feel him freeze up and pull slightly away. But you taste the taste of vanilla on his lips although you can't understand why this makes girls go goo-goo over him.

"Robbie…I'm dating Jade-"

"I know."

"But it's okay to be-"

"I'm not gay. I just needed to know."

/

Jade is furious. She pins you against your locker the next day in school and hisses in your face.

"What's your problem, Shapiro? First me, now my _boyfriend_? What? You want us to break-up so your dream of possibly dating me can come true? Well news flash Robbie- that's **not** going to happen, okay? I don't like you. You need to get over me. You and Sinjin."

Jade says the last part, nodding her head towards the curly haired, nerdier-than-you boy. He's staring this way with a look of adoration towards Jade and jealously towards you.

Jade lets you go and walks away. She leaves behind a scent of cinnamon and your b r o k e n h e a r t.

/

You can't get over Jade. It's just impossible. It's asking the sun to drink cheese, a raccoon to hug a fish without eating it, a fan to do jumping jacks- it just **doesn't** work.

Beck doesn't care about Jade _nearly_ as much as she does to him, you decide. Why else is he always trying to flirt to other girls and make her jealous?

You decide you're going to mention this to her and you try to find her after school. You see her getting ready to cross the street outside and you run out to her.

"Jade! Jade! Jade- wait!" You yell.

She turns around, glaring at you, "What?" She snaps.

"I want to talk to you about- JADE!" You screamed. The scene flashed hauntingly in your eyes.

She was crossing the street not paying you or anything any attention. A driver was preoccupied with something else in the car because they weren't looking as she crossed the street. The car hit her with so much force, Jade hit the front part and rolled down.

"Robbie, what's going on?" Beck asks you as he comes running up. You shakily point to your beloved on the ground, and the driver getting out of the car to check on her.

Beck turns pale as he yells her name and rushes to her side. There's a crowd gathering around all of you, whispering in fear. Tori and Andre come up to you looking horribly concerned and scared.

Cat runs up to you guys, a phone in her ear. "Hello? Is this 911? Oh it is? Well my friend got hit by a car! You need to help her!"

Cat rambles on about the address and what happened as she rushes to Beck and Jade and hold her friend's hands.

/

At the hospital you pace around the waiting room, scaredtodeath.

Beck and Cat keep pressing the nurse for information but she won't say anything. Tori and Andre try to comfort each other and them to no avail.

Nobody notices **you** standing in the corner, tears in your eyes.

The nurse finally lets you guys see her and you all rush to her room. Since only one person is let in at a time, Beck goes first. Tori and Andre go back to the waiting room, quiet and sad, while you and Cat watch from a tiny window inside.

Your own heart melts at the sight even though you 're supposed to hate Beck.

She's awake, with a bandage wrapped around her beautiful curls, a cast holding up her right arm, and a cast on her right leg. Her smiles brightens up the entire room when Beck runs to her and puts his head on her neck and his arms around it. With her left hand, she rubs circles on his back, still smiling.

He makes her promise that she's okay and she'll tell him if she needs anything.

She promises.

He makes her promise that she won't leave him or scare him like that again.

She promises.

He makes her promise that she knows he'll love her f o r e v e r.

She promises.

_(and your heart breaks)_

Cat makes Beck come out ten minutes later and she rushes in. Beck pats you on the back as he walks by you and into the waiting room again.

You wait anxiously for Cat to come out, who won't stop talking to Jade and hugging her. Jade's still smiling as Cat keeps crying.

Jade tells Cat that she's not leaving her any time soon.

Cat makes her promise.

She promises.

_(and you realize something important) _

Cat comes out after her ten minutes is up and she wipes away her tears and she happily exclaims, "Jade's going to live forever!"

You walk in nervously but Jade's smile doesn't fall.

"Hi…Jade…" You say your voice shaking.

"What did you want to tell me earlier?" She asks.

"That…you're always going to be Beck's only girl. And I'm sorry I tried to make it happen otherwise."


End file.
